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Let’s collect tech-related April’s fools jokes from today here that don’t warrant their own story.

Previously: 2014 2020 2021

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      I cannot agree with the section 3:

      When implementing specifications that are broken by design, it is RECOMMENDED to aggregate multiple smaller bugs into one larger bug. This will be easier to document: rather than having a lot of hard-to-track inconsequential bugs, there will be only a few easy-to-recognise significant bugs.
      

      Most people only use a subset of program’s functionality, and some functionality can in fact be completely unused by anyone at all. Keeping multiple small bugs documented is easier to make a distributed effort. As of bugs in unused functionality, they can be trivially fixed by removing the feature that no one uses anyway, which also removes all bugs associated with it. ;)

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      A bunch of us tech writers are all doing pieces outside our normal brands: https://www.aprilcools.club/

      Here’s my piece: https://hillelwayne.com/post/microscopy/

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        Andreas Kling (SerenityOS): “Why not just use X?”

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            A fun feature request for CockroachDB: AS OF FUTURE SYSTEM TIME.

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              Describe alternatives you’ve considered Other alternatives include having custom hardware. For example, Google’s Spanner uses hardware flux capacitors to jump their data into the future and return with it fully populated. Our solution enables every developer to build world-changing applications…soonish.

              I’m also partial to a hardware solution, but I think both this and the software solution are both a little over-engineered. I think the AS OF FUTURE SYSTEM TIME feature can easily be emulated by just taking the host system and running around with it, like, really fast for a little while, and then resyncing the database. No need for flux capacitors.

              I reckon Google went down that route because maintaining a stable mobile Internet connection in a vehicle that’s moving fast enough is pretty challenging and, historically, their focus has been on high-bandwidth wired connections in datacentres and the like. It’s weird that they’d go for such a complex solution though. Then again, I don’t know what I was expecting from the people that gave use fscking Kubernetes.

              I think the feature could also be emulated by e.g. relocating potential users closer to massive objects (*drumroll* no no this isn’t going where you think it’s going). But I think that may be a little intrusive, even by modern Internet standards.

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                I haven’t expected that that is how they’d explain it.

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                  Hahaha that broke someone’s build, the worst possible April Fools joke

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                    This is a parody of the infamous blog post that announced the discontinuation of CentOS.

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                        Hmm, nobody bothered with Drew’s announcement of git snail-mail?

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                          The day is over, but on CoRecursive we talked about the history of tech April Fools.

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                            Suslang: A language to replace all systems languages! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUuXjQqngF0

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                              The Stream of April’s fool jokes starts.

                              That FAQ is just low-effort though, come on! :)

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                                Either there’s a glitch in their CMS or someone got lazy because they do actually have a pretty funny FAQ page here. Maybe it was a draft and never got posted?

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                                      Today’s horoscope said that I would make new friends today. I’m beginning to astrology might be about as misguided as machine learning :-D.

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                                      Okay, that got me too. You are an amazing troll. Keep it up!

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                                        Thanks! I do my best to keep my trolling skills sharp! It’s important for me to have a backup plan in case I can no longer put bread on the table by programming, and given my cooking skills, standup comedy would likely be a lot more lucrative than flipping burgers.

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                                    BUT IT’S A MACH MICROKERNEL CLIENT THAT LEAVES NO FINGERPRINTS - THUS IT WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD :)

                                    I actually kind of miss the unbridled, almost delusional enthusiasm of those heady days in the 90s in NE43 when I visited.

                                    Those folks really truly believed.

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                                      The day is long over but…

                                      There’s a new PEP on Python style guide that I found hilarious.