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    When I first started working remote I also got really lonely. It’s a real thing that I think is overlooked too often. People fail to take into account how effectively being alone impacts your mental health. I found that chatting online and video calls just aren’t the same as actually being in the same room/space as people.

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      I had the exact same experience and switching from home to co-working space changed everything. I felt that I had “colleagues” even if not working at all for the same company. I rediscovered that the “coffee time” wasn’t about coffee but about socializing.

      I cannot stress enough that having a clear distinction from working space and personal space is really important.

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        I have the opposite experience. I work remotely from my kitchen, and I can spend days without talking to or seeing anyone. No “cabin fever,” whatever that means. I kinda miss coffee table socializing, but only a little bit. In fact such socializing can be quite painful & awkward for me, and I’m glad I no longer feel the obligation to join up at a coffee table..

        I checked out some coworking spaces and my employer said they’d cover the bills but at this point I don’t really see many benefits to it (they don’t even offer free coffee.. I’d reconsider if there was a good coffee maker that goes straight from beans to brew). There are definite downsides, such as the commute. And having to lug hardware back and forth if you don’t plan to always work from the coworking space.

        Now, being lonely can be a problem but my experience is that obligatory lunch/coffee table time with coworkers doesn’t fix it. Time with family or good friends would fix it.

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          Very interesting to read someone having the opposite feeling and experience!

          I found that having to commute also helped to put rythm in my day and have justification for being in town and see friends before going back home. Isn’t it something that you miss?

          What your routine like? Do you wake up, have breakfast and stay in the kitchen the whole day for work? Or do you have a more fragmented day?

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            What your routine like? Do you wake up, have breakfast and stay in the kitchen the whole day for work? Or do you have a more fragmented day?

            There are plenty of interviews posted on https://remotehabits.com/ with questions similar to these. I’m not affiliated with them. I just find the site useful enough to post a link.

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              Thanks that’s a great resource to get new ideas and improve remote days!

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              I have it somewhat similar to DuClare. I visit the place about once per week, taking with me an Intel Skull Canyon NUC, and that’s about the right frequency for me. Traffic jams, parking and people get on my nerves, even if I get over the awkwardness of meeting a subset of coworkers. No real life friends to speak of, too.

              I do not have any routine, other than a mild morning coffee. When I feel like it, I do 200 hours a month, when I don’t, I do way less and focus on personal projects. Life is short, don’t do what you hate.

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                I found that having to commute also helped to put rythm in my day and have justification for being in town and see friends before going back home. Isn’t it something that you miss?

                No friends. Spending time in town was never really a thing for me. My onsite jobs have always been on the outskirts of town or in the middle of nowhere (e.g. in a monastery). When I had to commute to town (for school), I’d always head straight home anyway.

                What your routine like? Do you wake up, have breakfast and stay in the kitchen the whole day for work? Or do you have a more fragmented day?

                I get up at around 8:55 am, get dressed, brush teeth, sign in on work laptop at 9:05 or so and start working, with a cup of coffee. I might go out and buy something on the lunch break, or I might quickly grab something from the fridge and maybe take a little nap afterwards. Lunch breaks end up taking 45 to 60 minutes. I log out sometime around 17:30, give or take 15 minutes. It’s been a very regular routine so far.

                It works pretty well, though I’d like to get in the habit of starting a little earlier (8:00-8:30), keep the lunch break under 45 mins and get more of that evening for myself.

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                For the cost of a months membership you can get a pretty amazing coffee setup at home.

                I order green beans online (dirt cheap and they keep for years), then roast (40 minutes every few weeks), and grind (this is the most expensive part; spend $300 or more on the grinder).

                After that an aeropress or stovetop espresso maker is fine (comparable automatic machines cost many hundreds).

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                  Man, the difference between what they call coffee at work and my basic coffee machine with decent beans… I can’t drink that disgusting shit at work without sugar. And they’ve already changed both the machine and the coffee beans supplier. I just don’t understand.

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              Agreed. I’ve been working full-time remote for almost four years now. The first year was great. But since then, I’ve noticed a distinct loneliness about it, and I miss interacting with my co-workers more directly. It certainly isn’t for everyone. That said, it has allowed me a great deal of freedom to live exactly where I wanted to live, and I wouldn’t trade that for the world.

              In the meantime, I’ve recently started co-working at a local co-working facility, and I enjoy getting out of the house a few days a week. It makes a big difference.

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                This is my experience too. I’ve been remote for a little more than 2.5 years now, and I’m feeling emotionally drained because working from home alone all day just sucks. The freedom is great, but I don’t know that it’s worth it.

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                  How much does your space charge per month and does your company cover any of that cost?

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                    This so much. I’m going thru a 4 year “can i do this forever” period. sigh.

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                  It seems the author (and other people here) are not the right type of person to be fully remote but perhaps only 50%.

                  Of course, sometimes people gotta be fully remote but if you go remote and immediately start missing the commuting and physical presence then it’s clearly not for you.

                  I find it extremely freeing as I don’t really have to make “small talk” when I am supposed to work and then I can use that energy with other people purely for friendship. Plus paid way more than having a simple monthly salary. Win, win, win!

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                    It seems that people react very differently to working remotely, I’ve read wildly differing narratives.

                    I’ve been working 100% remotely for 2 years now. It’s everything I’ve always wanted. I dread ever having to go back to an office and I hope it never happens.

                    Being lonely is of course terrible. In fact, there’s research to support that it’s the most important thing to avoid if one wants to be mentally and physically healthy. What I don’t understand about other remote programmers is how they feel lonely whilst coding. If I lived by myself, didn’t make the effort to meet friends for lunch, didn’t play team sports, didn’t go to the pub? Sure, I’d be lonely as well. But that’s where I interact with people, not at work.

                    When I worked at an office, I’d waste precious time commuting, the environment was way too noisy to concentrate in, and people would constantly distract me. And don’t mention the $#@! meetings. At my job I’m either writing code, designing code, debugging code, or doing code review. All of these activities require no distractions.

                    And there’s more: there were precious few people I even liked at the office anyway. Lunch break conversations would devolve into talking about the weather, upcoming/just-completed holidays or whatever food you happened to be eating. Hardly anyone wanted to talk shop, because nobody was actually interested in their job or craft and I’d be bored out of my mind.

                    Again, this is all personal, but I’d much rather sleep as much as I need, work whenever, not go to meetings, never get distracted, and socialise with my actual friends instead of randos I don’t even like that I’ve been stuck with at a noisy bright (I had to hide behind the monitor sometimes to avoid the sun) open plan office.

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                      I love not going to an office, but I have a family. How many of you who find remote working lonely live alone or with people you’re not close with?

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                        I’m curious about this too. I’m working from home, with family around too, and don’t miss interactions in the office. Even when I worked in an office, I tried to keep those to a minimum, and preferred days where I just went by without talking to anyone directly (we did communicate through computers, mind you). But then, I’m a bit of a recluse…

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                          I live alone. It’s lonely, but it was lonely when I had an onsite job too. Having people around does not remove that feeling. It takes people that you can really connect with at a deeper level. Like family or real friends.

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                            I don’t live alone but have before.

                            Currently living with my partner and a friend who’s living 50% at our place due to a long-distance relationship.

                            Living alone and working remotely was really hard, because I would easily go through days and sometimes weeks without actually seeing anyone I know. All depends on your surrounding social life of course. I’ve never been particularly social, and now moved to a city (country even) where I don’t know anyone, and I’m not great at making friends. So I decided to go back to an office after doing that for a year.

                            Sometimes I think that I can’t actually stand either permanently, but just need to switch every year or two until I get fed up.

                            My actual idea situation might be unlimited remote working while living close to the office so I can come in if I feel like it in the morning, though that robs me of the ability to move countries regularly, which is a thing I do.